Wednesday, September 7, 2016

Desperate Housewives Gone Bad

Oh...how the suburbs just r.o.c.k.

We've lived here a year, this month. We *love* our house and the historic neighborhood that we live in....as I mentioned in my previous post, it is very woodsy feeling for this part of the world (45 minutes from Manhattan). The abundance and variety of trees and birds is really wonderful. It is like Fantasia each and every morning: bunnies, birds of all shapes and sizes, woochucks, etc. All of that said, we have not really met anyone with the exception of the neighbor directly across the street. She actually seemed quite lovely right off the bat, brought us over cookies with her little daughter, introduced herself, etc.

In my mind, I was tripping over myself to be friendly, chatty, chipper etc. I sent her a thank you note for the cookies, a Xmas card, and have chatted at every appropriate opportunity including unshowered at the grocery store. K has also extended himself and he is not particularly gregarious by nature. He is far more reserved but has often stopped over to chat while out working on the yard.

Beyond this woman who we will call Neighbor #1 (N1 for short), we have not found anyone else to be particularly friendly. Her two sidekicks, also stay at home mom's, are often hanging around in each others yards, etc, but neither will so much as wave hello. I kind of thought they were jerks but really didn't think too much of it. I continued to wave like a lunatic to every person that drove within 2 miles of our house.

Enter Auggie and N2 (Neighbor #2). I met N2 during lunch time walks when she also walks her dog. We both chatted it up immediately, she was friendly and I liked her a lot. I saw her today and one thing leads to another and she informs me that N1 has been very gossipy about her and that we should be careful what we say to her because she has already put out the word that K and I are "not friendly". Huh???? WTF???? One could imagine that N2 was saying out of spite for not being a part of N1's click but she cited 2 incidences that she would not have known if N1 had not been talking about us. The first being that I didn't answer the door on Halloween. She is correct, when I was on the phone with my best friend for 1/2 hour, I did not answer the door. Fucking sue me. The second instance is that we had a bbq and invited her and her hubby and daughter. She said he had to work so we assumed that meant she wasn't interested in coming but said, please come if you feel like it. Well my bad. I didn't follow up with her and invited her AGAIN.

Quite simply, these people suck. They are bored, insecure, snitty wives with no lives outside of their snarky, small town bullshit. Rather than being angry and hurt, I should be compassionate for how lame they are. But I am not quite there yet. I'm still pissed and hurt. We're new here. Our friends are all back in the city. It would have been nice to live somewhere that we feel like we fit in and have a little community.

Oh well. I guess we are just one step closer to finally moving off the grid to the farm in Montana or Colorado to raise our farm of bulldogs. Ha!